WORLD RACE GAP YEAR!

Hi friends!

WOW WOW WOW! As some of you already know, I’ve committed to heading on Route 4 of the World Race Gap Year! Here’s some ponderings that led me here (:

July 31st, 2025, A-Squad arrived back in the states after almost 2 months in Asia. We traveled to a small island in Indonesia and a huge city in Thailand, with stops in Boston, Bangkok, Singapore, and the Qatar airport. It was WILD. Our squad faced challenges ranging from disagreements to spiritual warfare. We ended up in hospital rooms and remote villages. There was feet washing and apologies, night market shopping and rooftop worshiping. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, and I knew from the moment we got to our first country that I would do it all over again if ever I got the chance.

I wanted to share about two of my favorite moments from our time on the international field in Asia, one from each country. Our very first night in Indonesia, our whole squad got the opportunity to go to the kid’s center. My team of 5 would spend the next 3 weeks serving there, but this was such a sweet moment with all of us present. When we walked in, kids were running everywhere. Imagine a 3 story building with dozens of kids and 20-something jet-lagged racers who speak another language tying to corral them all onto one floor… IT WAS SO MUCH FUN. Once most of the kids were running around on the second floor, hitting punching bags, playing games, and throwing balls, I took a step back and looked around. On the staircase, I saw a little girl (later nicknamed ‘Mini’), maybe about 3, sitting alone. She seemed closed-off, skeptical, and in her own world. I began to talk to her, but quickly realized that route wasn’t going to work. So, I ended up sitting with her. Not drawing closer, because she would pull away. Just sitting, staying. After around 30 minutes, I was able to convince her to come into the room – by telling her she could hit the punching bag. After landing a few hits with the full-force of her tiny body, she began to trust me just a little bit more, and asked me to help her climb it. She let me pick her up! Then, she rarely wanted to be put down. While my squadmates said “see you later” to the other kids, she stayed in my arms, hands around my neck. When it came time for me to grab my shoes (chacos, of course), a friend came over to meet Mini. As much as I love and trust this friend, he’s a guy, and whatever her story, Mini didn’t trust him.

Some moments are ones you know may be ingrained in your mind forever, and this, for me, was definitely one of them. I don’t think I’ll ever forget the way it seemed this little girl was attempting to shrink herself into my arms, an attempt desperate just to get AWAY. That was my first introduction to overseas ministry, and I walked away with a heart broken and just beginning to understand the weight of what I said “yes” to. Over the next 2 months, I saw the goodness of God in the wildest of places. I experienced hurt, loss, and heartache. I learned lessons I never wanted to be taught and ended up in places I had been too naive to acknowledge existed before seeing them with my own eyes. And, I often thought, “What did I get myself into?” I lived in shock, not fully processing anything, and somewhere between “fight” or “flight” on any given day. This world was so new to me, and I felt so not-ready.

A month later, in Thailand, I got incredibly sick. I couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep, and was lovingly banned from going to ministry by one of my amazing squad leaders. It SUCKED. But, when I returned to our team’s ministry (shout out Acts One), I returned with a gratefulness for EVERYTHING. In Indonesia, I got to be around kiddos all the time. In Thailand, we were in storage containers carrying boxes and sorting books. It sounded less-than-glamorous. That sickness taught me that this life is SUCH A GIFT. That the ability to do ministry of ANY kind is such a gift. I had to be humbled and divinely attitude-checked, to really appreciate what a blessing it was to serve the LORD. I said I would go anywhere and do anything, until it came to something I didn’t want to do. It took lying in bed, crying to Kailey because I was in so much pain, to show me deep gratitude may produce deep joy.

That month in Thailand was so amazing. We had been split up from the guys and enjoyed a couple of weeks in the “girl’s house”. Our ministry host was hilarious and you could tell that team was hand picked to sort books for the LORD!! It wasn’t what I expected – it was better. We danced, laughed, ate cashew chicken, bought so many books, worshiped, had difficult conversations with joy, and learned so much about God. We talked theology and learned more of His heart. If you asked anyone from Acts One, they would tell you about how deeply impactful those sweaty weeks in storage units were. Also, Elina got kicked by a horse (on the BEAUTIFUL plot of land), so that was pretty funny.

After telling a friend stories from the summer, she looked at me with shock and asked, “And you STILL want to go back?” With surprise and ease I told her that, yes, I still want to go back. I couldn’t think of a better way to spend nine months than back on the international field. Because the stories of a missionary aren’t always happy. But something I’m learning lately is that we can’t know deep joy without also sharing about, and going through, the hard parts.

These stories are riddled with heartbreak and hurt, tears and deep sorrow. Living thousands of miles away means you’re going to miss things, and it’s going to be painful. Maybe you’ll get sick and have to be humbled, maybe you’ll walk a three-year-old down streets full of men, still with the ever-present hope that one day you’ll both walk on streets of gold. But maybe you’ll also scream “MOONBEAM ICE CREAM” as you drive back from ministry with 4 girls you got to share life with. Maybe on your 19th birthday you’ll worship on a rooftop in Thailand. Maybe you’ll wash feet in Indonesia and hear words of life spoken over you that you have to fight to believe are true. Maybe you’ll finally learn, finally accept that you are, and have always been, so deeply loved.

Maybe it isn’t easy, but obedience has definitely always been worth it. Maybe it will change your life as you know it, and maybe you’ll never want to stop going. Maybe a “yes” to a summer will lead you to a “yes” for 9 months.

As a friend said, I think I’ll be processing those 2 months with the LORD for the rest of my life on this earth. And I’m so excited to go for another 9.

August 2026, friends! World Race Gap Year. 9 months, 5 countries, still the same message; JESUS IS LORD + HE’S COMING BACK.

Fundraising updates coming soon (:

Jesus loves you and I do, too. “May mercy, peace, and love be multiplied to you.” Jude 1:2.

<3 Shay